Once Upon a Tanbo

Birthday plus something about myself

Posted on: October 18, 2007

So I celebrated my 24th birthday on Monday. Sadly the day wasn’t that
eventful. In fact it was just like anyother Monday morning, boring with
nothing to do. That night two of my JET girlfriends threw me a
mini-dinner/party with just the 2 of us. It was nice.. having a big
party is fun and all but I like just being able to have an intimate
thing with people that I feel comfortable with. It was an ok birthday
all and all.. I’ve gotten to the point where birthdays suddenly aren’t
as fun šŸ˜¦

My personality can irritate me sometimes. As in, I irritate myself. I
have some charactheristics which I know are positive but at the same
time so negative. One of the biggest benefits/flaws is that I absolutely
hate to dissapoint anyone or upset anyone. A lot of this has to do with
planning. And going out..

A lot of time people will ask me to do something and go out, and I’ll be
on the fence about it, but I’ll say yes just because I don’t want to
hurt the persons feelings, or I just flat out am too chicken to say no.
And then.. as the event approches I suddenly don’t want to go or etc.
etc… and then I try and get out of it and just end up looking worse.
Im trying to get to the point where I can say no to things, but the
pressure of being asked is so hard. Im a people pleaser by nature, which
is one of the reasons I think I try not to get too close to too many
people at once. The more that I like someone the more that I want them
to be happy as well like me. And the more I will go out of my way to do
stuff for them. And it can be exhausting, espicially as I get older.

When I was in junior high school this proved to be the point of many
fights.. My friends would have fights or say stupid things and I would
try to play both sides and get them to either make up or be friends
again. Lets just say meddling in those things didn’t help much and it
seems like I was the one who always ended up getting in the brunt of all
the anger. Needless to say I really don’t do that now.. but I really
hate having to choose a side or pick or something. I hate having to
dissapoint someone, espicially someone who I care about. Little things
like how I can arrange my weekends/time to accomodate everyone worry me
for hours..

I think that at first I appear very shy and reserved, but after I feel
comfortable I open up and am silly and bubbly and.. I hope fun to be
around. It seems like people usually get such a bad first impression
because they say I am so quiet.. but I think its just because it takes
me a while to access and procede with each persons personality type.
Once I feel comfortable I can talk for hours. I read somewhere that
means I’m introvereted.. I used to think I was an extrovert but now as
Im getting older little by little I think that I’m introverted… or
maybe just shy. Large crowds or groups or parties just overwhelm me.

Sometimes I just wish I could change, and some parts of my personality
have over there years, but this.. almost dog-like quality remains. It
can be so frustrating.. *sigh*


2 Responses to "Birthday plus something about myself"

Hi Sara… this is Jessica from FWC…

I was reading this post with interest. I’m the same way. I am definitely a people pleaser, and have always found it extremely hard to just say no to people.

I have found that as you get older, and definitely once you’re married, kids on the way, that kind of thing, people start expecting less of you socially, which has been very nice for me. I think part of it is it’s your mid-20s, where you’re expected to want to go out and party and meet people and drink and all that good stuff, and if you don’t feel like it people will honestly give you a hard time about it. A few years down the road though, everyone is so wrapped up in their own lives that they just don’t care. Or something like that.

Anyhow, happy birthday, a mellow birthday is just as nice as a big old party sometimes. Hope you had a good one.

Happy Birthday!

My name is Sarah and my birthday is next week so I couldn’t resist sending you some birthday wishes.

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