Once Upon a Tanbo

Posting in the midnight hour

Posted on: June 25, 2009

Today wasn’t such a great day although there was no particular reason for it to be like that. I got some nasty upper tummy/rib cramps today.. they didn’t feel exactly like the one’s I had a while back so maybe a round of braxton-hicks? I really haven’t felt any of those yet… BG was also moving around a lot when I was having the pains so maybe she was putting a lot of pressure on my upper tummy. A soak in the warm bath helped and I felt better since but I couldn’t eat anything for dinner since I was so uncomfortable and had to listen to my MIL being overly concerned the whole time. I wish she would just leave me alone… I know she is trying to be helpful (?) but I am just cranky and don’t want anyone to be around anyone who A. isn’t Ryohei or B. doesn’t speak English. Yes – I know I sound like a horrible brat but thats just how I feel right now.

Had a bit of a cry tonight for the first time in a while. I am really missing my friends – of course my blog into real life friends but also my Kansai friends. I miss being able to hope on a train and about 300 yen and 30 minutes later be talking and enjoying time with good friends like SassyMoo, Corinne, and Beamies. The worst thing about being here is having no one close by to meet up with for sure… and it makes me so insanely jealous of anyone living in the city area with a plethora of foreign wife type friends to meet up with. I’m a fairly social person and being on my own all the time is so hard… I’ve had a few offers of people to come visit me here… but it just seems like such a waste until after the baby is born and we are properly moved in… I can’t do much now anyways – I felt so horrible about being so useless when Nay and Laura came to visit a couple weeks ago… and esp. meeting someone for the first time I would want to be a better hostess than just lying around like a moo-cow all day.

Have I mentioned I want to not be pregnant anymore?! I honestly feel like a small whale or something… probably weight about the same too. Bring on the magic -500 calorie a day breastfeeding.

Anyways – Ryohei was pretty nice tonight. He listened to me cry and let me use his leg as a pillow for a bit – yes we have our fights and disagreements – but he is very supportive usually and I think he feels really bad for me sometimes. He asked if I was having Mama Blues which was a nice way of asking if my crazy hormones were responsable for some of the downpour and I said most likely. I tend to cry a lot during PMS time as well so I’m sure that lady hormones are part of the reason why I have been so blue.

Theres more but I guess this isn’t really the time or place to talk about it… I’m getting tired and BG is starting to wind down for the night so might as well see if I can get a few hours of sleep in before the next potty break.

Night all

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21 Responses to "Posting in the midnight hour"

I know how that feels Sarah. 😦 I miss my friends a lot too. It sucks not being able to just meet up for coffee and a chat with your girlfriends. I hope that when you get settled and when BG has been here for a few months you can meet some other foreigners in your city. I am sure there have to be some foreign wives living in the city you’re moving to, it isn’t as if it is a village or anything, it is big enough for a Starbucks! I know new friends can never replace the old ones, but having a social outlet I think is so important for a new mom’s sanity, especially if you’re going to be a SAHM (for me my social outlet is my job. When we first moved to Beijing the one great thing about my office was that there were these awesome foreigners working there and we could chat! In English!).

Hang in there. Your body is going to go through a lot of discomfort in the next few weeks as it prepares for labor. The pains and stuff are a good sign, they mean your body is working, getting ready, and hopefully easing the way for BG’s entrance to the world. Only a few more weeks to go! And if you can make it past your moving date, you’re really home free and I’m sure you’ll breathe a huge sigh of relief at that point. I’m glad Ryohei has been supportive and there for you, that’s what husbands are for (aside from the pillow function, of course).

Yah I’m hoping to make friends when I move as well… not sure if there are any other foreign wive types living in the new city. I mean I can make Japanese friends as well I’m sure its just sort of different especially if they’ve never had an experience beyond Japanese culture. And I really don’t want to be speaking too much Japanese in front of the baby since I’ll be her only English outlet at this point…

Maybe I will camp out at Starbucks and introduce myself to anyone who looks friendly enough!

I feel so gross at this point, I’ve always been “big” but never huge to the point where it hurts to get up and walk around and of course the “pains” aren’t really welcome! Yup – just a bit until moving day, I guess then I should be able to relax a bit more.

pregnancy crying for me was a different kind of monster all together…I would sob like a child. Uncontrollably at times, and would be set off by the silliest things!

I live in Tokyo, so I understand the need to meet up with people constantly, having someone to understand what you are dealing with, etc…

And I REALLY remember needing to have the baby out at the point you are at. I would go to the doctors office and sob (pregnancy sobbing) when the doc would tell me my “saloon doors” were still tightly closed…and at 42 weeks pregnant I just didn’t have any tears left….walked around like a zombie most days!

And I agree with Jessica…but my husband tends to be a better pillow at times!

Gosh I really really hope I don’t have to hold out until 42 weeks… I think that we will be at the peak of summer at that point and I can’t imagine how crapptastic and cranky I would be at that point!

I def. miss living in Tokyo – I have so many friends who live there now and while its closer to Niigata than Kobe where I used to live its still way too far (and expensive) to go more than once every 2 – 3 months or so…

I’m already hoping Ryohei can get transferred there… but thats only a very slight possibility that won’t be for a few years. I really like Japan – and living here (85% of the time) but I think thats when I can live “my way” with the appropriate foreign influences – food, friends, etc etc… the adjustment to here has been rough since I have no friends and my PIL are always cooking washoku!!!

Miss you too sweety!!! Our Kobe lunches were always fun.

I know!! I miss our La Pausa lunches!!! Have you been to Nishinomiya Gardens lately for Cold Stone?! Please have some in rememberence of me!

Yup, another crier here. Poor K, sometimes I’d cry if he did something and sometimes I’d cry if he didn’t do the exact same thing.

And the MIL thing? Mine liked me until I got pregnant. Then I became the irresponsible, strange idea holding, non sock-wearing untrustworthy and incompetent carrier of her grandchild. Ok, not that bad but yeah, grandkids win over DIL anyday it seems…

Count down the days!

I think that first statement could sum me up pretty much. Ryohei was like “is it my fault?! what did i do?!” and I was like “not this time” hahahahah – poor guy

Yah – grandchild totally trumps DIL for sure… and if I have to listen to one more “ara.. maaa” after I mention something related to pregnancy I will throw something or maybe someone out the window into the rice paddie waiting below.

I miss you too! Big hugs your way and little ones from R-rex too!

Awww thanks!!! I’d love to give little R-rex a cuddle!! His smile always brightened my day 😀

I can really feel for you there. When I moved from Tokyo to Gunma, I was still ok, because I was commuting to Tokyo and still had the odd staying out all night and catching the first train episode.

It is a lot to take in, being preggers, moving and leaving your friends. Important thing is, I suppose is to accept that it is temporary. I know that is hard when you feel so crappy, so embrace the tears too! Better out than in. Really. I used to cry at the news and anything involving babies or animals. Actually, I still can’t keep it together when watching anything involving babies or animals!

Just think, when baby is born, you will be able to start getting your body back! All those walks in the countryside with your little one, putting your feet up for feeding time, lazy lunches 🙂

And I will be driving up to see you probably more often than you would like, ha ha! I am lonely too 😦 So how about make a Mummies lunch date at least twice a month? Wish I could have made it up there before I went back to the U.K.

As for your friends, when you get used to having daily life with two, big cities are not too far from your reach, even by trains and buses. It is surprising how much you can do once you shift your heavy load (God, didn’t mean that to sound so heartless!).

Big hug,

Laura x

Yah I suppose before kiddies came along a Maebashi – Tokyo commute would have still be doable time and money wise… I actually wanted to live in Gunma as I figured it was country enough for Ryohei and close enough to get into the city for me… alas it was not to be!!

I cry all the time too – I’m currently watching the Ghost Whisperer and pretty much cry every episode that one of the ghosts or one of the ghosts family members is a kid and they have to say good-bye and I love you and stuff…

I would love to have my body back… looking at recent pictures is soooo depressing as my face is bloated and my boobs look like two huge grapefruits. Blech…

I would love to make a lunch date when you get back from the U.K.!! I feel bad since I can’t drive it makes it a lot more difficult for me to get down there altho I can “convince” Ryohei to drive us down on the weekends!!

Thanks for the baby magazines btw – I’ve been enjoying them!! One of them even had a special on birth in other countries with a portion on Japan… it made me laugh and sigh and the reality of it all! But at least we aren’t in Uganda where apparently you can’t drink water standing up or it will give the baby slanty eyes?!~

Missing friends is shit. It is one of the hardest things about moving anywhere. I used to yearn for my friends in Kagoshima when I moved back to London.

Sorry you are feeling blue but you are so close to meeting your daughter, just keep focused on that. The good news is that while it may not feel that way right now, it will feel like the past 9 months flew by when your daughter has been here for about 6 months! 😉

I never regret making my friends but I do miss them a lot… its very hard but just a part of life I guess. Hopefully I will make some new friends here – I’ve already talked with several lovely people that are within an hours or two drive away – its just hard with out a car since the trains are so expensive.

I am looking forward to the baby being here since time seems to fly!! I look at all my friends children and can’t believe how big they have gotten!!

Sara darling I know how you feel about the bloating, being emotional, crying, every six months I get a “horrid” period to the point my emotions are out of control, crying, angry, I took medication for the symptoms but that just made me sick, and I can’t know which month I’ll be hit with it.

This month was that month and I have to say, even though I have friends 10 minutes away it is not the same as my husband being there for me.

You are moving, I had to move yesterday, had a bad period, barely can walk, boobs hurt. Do you get those each month or do they come every few? I had to take medication once, it got so bad I could not control the crying, and I would get so angry, then cry again.

My period had always been heavy but after I was preggers my boobs, etc would hurt each time that month would role around.

You have been through a roller coaster ride these few years.
Anyhoo you’ll have the bub out soon enough, but girl… I can feel your pain on the moving front, maybe a vacation?

Hubs and I are going to stay in Fuji for the summer till Oct, you are more than welcome to come swim anytime, get away, mini-vaycay..

Hmm I’ve never had HORRIBLE periods… I’ve had friends like you who seem to go through hell and back each month. I usually just have “bad” or “sad” days where things that wouldnt normally phase me make me cry – a little bit like now!

So you guys have a “summer home” wow how posh!! I’m not sure if I’ll be in the position to do much traveling THIS summer but it sounds wonderful!!

Yea, my periods (like now) are horrid! Some months light, others heavy, back ache, sometimes I throw up like I am preggers and thank goodness the bad only comes around every couple of months.

I am up late to tonight unpacking! OH… Sara, the reason for me commenting…. again (sorry)

We are renting the summer home, we don’t own it, although that would be nice!

Either way, you are more than welcome, you and your friends = )

Night, hope you can get some sleep tonight.

Hey just peeking at your blog to see how things are going in the rare spare moment I have to be on the net longer than fifteen minutes (ds is finally not waking up twenty minutes after I put him to bed). I may not be on here commenting much (or reading as much as I’d like to) but I am thinking of ya! Hang in there 🙂 Your new place looks nice, but definitely splurge and get the soundproof curtains (personal experience). We have to buy a kitchen counter thing too- hate Japanese kitchens! Sorry you are missing your friends so much and are so alone where you are. Glad you have the internet though. Take care!

Hey nice to hear from you!! Feels like its been a while but I know you’ve been busy with little guy, working, and moving!!! What sort of counter are you looking for? I’ve found a really really nice one if you want to take a look at it!! Fits an oven range plus all sorts of other kitchen denki items! Let me know if you want to see and I will msg the link to your facebook 🙂

Crying – yip, and with the first one I got sympathy but with the bunster not so much. It is amazing that men can think that pregnancy and childbirth gets easier the more you do it. What bollocks. It gets a tiny less scary but not easier, and being pregnant I think gets harder the more kids you have.

You are so nearly there. I hope for your sake BG is out before 42 weeks too. That would be stink. When Shou was little I would take him in the car and we would just drive. I found a nice half hour drive out by the coast and I would buy a coffee and get the ipod and contemplate the world as Shou slept in his car seat. Thank god all the kids have been sleep in carseats babies. Harder for you without your licence – but then you have a starbucks close by so I think that almost rules out the not having a car bit.

I can imagine that hubs thinks you have hardened up (lol) after the first one – but I can’t IMAGINE being in this much discomfort both physically and mentally and having to take care of two young children… you must be running on some super hormones!!

I really really hope it won’t come to 42 weeks… actually pretty sure it won’t since my clinic induces between 5 – 9 days past due date and I’m pretty sure I’ll be able to weasel my way into ask around the 24th or so.. since I don’t want my huge gaijin baby to get even bigger.

BG is going to love Starbucks… why? Because she’ll be staying there just about as much as her own home!! She actually seems to like driving already – I think the motion lulls her to sleep as she always seems so calm in the car and is a little tyrant most other times.. like oh.. past midnight when all I want to do is SLEEP.

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